Background:
So, here’s the deal. I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD and Bipolar disorder. I’m in my late 30s, married, no kids, and right now, I’m the one bringing home the bacon while my wife is off studying.
The Issue:
I’ve come to terms with the fact that I have a pretty big spending problem, and I think it all boils down to my struggles with controlling my emotions. I grew up in a middle-class family, always had a knack for business ideas, and made money early on. But I’d lose interest as soon as things got repetitive.
Once I started working and had my own cash flow, I went a little wild. Money was rolling in from my IT job, and I went all out with fancy dinners, new tech gadgets, and even bought a car – stuff I really didn’t need.
The Cycle:
Fast forward, now I’m using most of my salary to pay off credit cards because I can’t control my spending habits. Despite having all these expensive things, I’ve got zilch in savings. I get swept up in new ideas or hobbies, but quickly lose interest, racking up more debt and feeling like a failure.
My wife and I see this pattern clearly. I’ve tried to stop splurging, but it usually ends up with me feeling down and frustrated. Giving in to my impulses makes me happy in the moment, but then I’m right back to feeling crappy about my finances.
What I’ve Tried:
I get the basics of saving and budgeting. I’ve read books, watched videos, and even listened to podcasts, but when it comes to putting it into action, my love for instant gratification usually wins. I’ve gotten to the point where I avoid looking at our budget because I’m scared to face the truth about our financial mess.
Seeking Help:
I’m legit scared about our future. The idea of losing my job and everything we’ve worked for? It’s a nightmare.
If anyone’s been in my shoes and turned things around, I’m all ears. How did you break the cycle and start saving while still being content with what you’ve got? Any advice or stories would seriously mean the world to me.
Farewell,
Money Troubles No More
Response from THE MONEY MINDER:
Hello There,
Hi there,
I want to commend you for having the courage to address this issue head-on. It’s not easy to confront our personal challenges, especially when they involve deeply ingrained habits and emotions. Your willingness to seek advice and support is a positive step towards finding a solution.
From what you’ve described, it seems like your spending habits are closely tied to impulsive behavior and a desire for instant gratification. This is a common struggle for many individuals, and it’s important to approach it with understanding and patience. One practical approach that might help is to create a detailed budget that accounts for all your expenses, including debt payments. This will give you a clear picture of your financial situation and help you identify areas where you can make adjustments.
In addition to budgeting, consider setting specific financial goals for yourself. Start small, such as saving a certain amount each month or paying off a credit card balance. Breaking down your goals into manageable steps can make them more achievable and less overwhelming. It may also be helpful to involve your wife in the process, as having a supportive partner can provide both accountability and encouragement.
Seeking professional help, such as financial counseling or therapy, can also be beneficial. A professional can offer guidance tailored to your specific situation and provide strategies to help you manage impulsive behaviors and emotional triggers related to spending.
Remember that changing behavior takes time and effort, so be patient with yourself as you work towards financial stability. It’s okay to have setbacks along the way, but what matters most is your commitment to making positive changes for your future.
All the best from THE MONEY MINDER.
