“I don’t want finances to become a source of resentment”: I want to manage money with my husband post-wedding. How can we avoid financial conflicts as a newlywed couple?

Hi Money Minder,

Hey there! My husband (29M) and I (26F) tied the knot just 2 weeks ago after being together for 4 years. We’ve had joint accounts for about 2 or 3, but now we’re trying to figure out the best way to handle our finances as a married couple.

So, here’s the deal – we each get our paychecks deposited into our personal checking accounts and then split the bills accordingly. He makes more money than I do (15-20k more per year), so he covers more expenses. I take care of things like HOA, water, sewer, pest control, and our furry friend’s needs. I also have insurance deductions coming up, and he covers the internet, electricity, security, and food expenses. We split the mortgage evenly each month and handle our individual expenses separately.

We’ve started putting some money into our joint account to save up a little, but I’m not sure if our current setup is the best way to go about things. We want to start building together, but I’m apprehensive about having all our paychecks go into a joint account. I like to have my own money just in case, you know? I also don’t want finances to become a source of tension between us.

I’m curious to know how other married couples handle their finances. Do you keep things separate but pitch in for shared expenses? Any advice on what we could do differently? We want to make sure we’re on the right track before diving into the world of retirement savings and investments.

Any insights are welcome! Thanks in advance for your help, Money Minder.

Farewell,
Seeking Financial Harmony

Response from THE MONEY MINDER:

Hello There,

Congratulations on your recent marriage! It’s great to hear that you and your husband are taking a proactive approach to managing your finances together. It’s understandable that you want to ensure that your financial setup is conducive to building a strong financial future as a couple.

Based on the details you’ve shared, it seems like you have a good foundation in place with your joint checking account and the way you split expenses. It’s important to have open communication about money matters and to address any concerns early on.

One practical suggestion could be to consider setting up a joint savings account in addition to your joint checking account. This can be a designated account for saving towards future goals such as emergency fund, vacations, home improvements, or any other joint financial goals you may have.

When it comes to managing individual expenses and personal spending, it’s important to have a balance between independence and transparency. You may want to have periodic financial check-ins to review your overall financial situation, discuss any changes or adjustments needed, and ensure that both of you are on the same page.

Regarding your concern about maintaining your own financial independence, it’s completely valid to want to have a sense of security. You could consider setting aside a portion of your individual income as personal savings for peace of mind.

Remember that every couple’s financial situation is unique, and it’s important to find a system that works best for both of you. It’s great that you’ve already sought advice from a financial planner, and continuing to educate yourselves on financial matters will only benefit your relationship in the long run.

All the best from THE MONEY MINDER.